CAT Scan today -- Happpy Halloween

So today is Halloween!
Happy Halloween!!

I spent the morning in the hospital getting a CAT scan!
I went to the hospital at 9am

This is suppose to be the end all, be all test for me!! I should have an answer on treatment on Nov 5th when I meet with my doctor!

The CAT Scan went well. The same nurse who put my IV in my arm last CAT Scan was there.
She remembered me.. which was nice! (FYI: I hate IVs)

I left the hospital and called my friend Todd

Todd is lives in Chicago -- he was just diagnosed with Lung Cancer
Todd was in the hospital as well today -- he will be starting Chemo.

Its odd how we met-- we met through cancer.
We both are at different parts of our treatments, but we have bonded quickly.

Of course, I still have Kevin! Kevin is a great comfort for me.
However, I have an odd sense of anxiety because I know that this test will show if my tumors have become larger, smaller or stayed the same.

Ironically, I have been fighting for this answer since August, but now that it is here (or I truely will find out on Nov 5th) Im kind of scared to find out.

If the CAT shows that all is well (and I am not sure how I will define well)... then the questions I will ask are as follows:

• why am I still in pain?
• What has all of this meant over the past few months?
  
• Where did the cancer go?
  
• Will it come back?

If it is bad --- well.... then... that sucks!!

I feel that either way this test comes out... I might not be satisfied...
It is kind of an uncomfortable spot to be in!!

Nevertheless, it is Halloween!
I am on duty and it is raining badly here in Sacramento tonight.

Happy Halloween

Trick or Treat....

Urgent CAT Scan... Friday

I had my blood tests last Friday. I have not yet received any results however I will be meeting with my doctor on Nov 5th with the results of my tests tomorrow.
I have my CAT Scan tomorrow (Friday). It was suppose to be at 3pm, however, i just got a phone call this afternoon informing me that they need to change my appt to 9am.

I was informed by the nurse that the doctors did not want me to have a CAT scan at the lab, but they wanted me to have a CAT Scan in the radiology department so that a radiologist could over see the procedure.
When I asked the nurse why this decision was made, i was informed that the doctors wanted to have a radiology make sure that this scan was done correctly because my case is so complicated.

So I am a bit concerned, but I will know more information on Nov 5th, when my results come back and I meet with my oncologist.

Waiting sucks.....

Blood Tests --

On Friday October 24, 2008 I went to the UC Davis Cancer Center for blood tests ordered by UC San Diego Morse Cancer Doctors (my second opinion doc)

I also went and spoke to Dr. Tanaka's advise nurse Debbie because I am not feeling very well. The pain (in and around) the tumors has been quite intense in the past week. Dr. Tanaka has ordered another CAT Scan for next week to see if my tumors have grown, stayed the same, or shrunk.

So I am pending a phone call from the Cancer Lab of when the CAT scan will be schedule for.
I also have a scheduled visit with my doctor on November 5th to discuss the results of my CAT scans!!

Sky Diving

October 19, 2008

Lodi, California

Sky Diving

There was a group of us from Sac State that went sky diving (24)
We had an amazing time!!

I think that the pictures are the only thing that could describe this experience!!

My dive partner is Rob

My photographer is Jhonny

Amazing time


The Plane



Jhonny (the photographer), Me, Rob (the man with the parachute attached to my back!! )



That would be a face of fear




..and I looked down... GOOD LORD!





AND JUMP!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHH





AMAZING






And Landing...


Rob and I -- Post jump!

Experience of a life time
I was asked if I would ever do this again --- and I would NOT!
Once was enough!!

(note: for a complete set of the photos, please check out my myspace page)

To Draw Blood OR not.... :(

So yesterday (Friday October 17th) I went to the UC Davis Cancer Center to do blood work.

I am pissed!

My hall manager, Colby, and I drove to UC Davis Cancer Center to do my blood work after I received a phone call from oncology nurse Debbie at the UC San Diego Morse Cancer Center informing me that Dr. Lowy would like me to blood work.

I left work immediately (4pm) and drove to the hospital.
When I got there, no orders had been placed!

I called Debbie at the UC San Diego Morse Cancer Center --- and everyone had gone home for theweekend.

Frustrated.

I will call on Monday.

I am on duty this weekend, however tomorrow I am going sky diving!!

Yes, Sky Diving. A few years ago (before I was diagnosed with cancer) my friend Nico and I created a list of things we would like to do before we die. On my list was to sky dive. About a month ago, I was asked by one of my staff member, Marcos (an RA in Desmond Hall) to go sky diving with him. I immediately said yes!! However, I have not given it one thought until right now... HA! I'm nervous! I mean, I just paid $120 to jump out of a plane. How crazy is that!?!

I will be purchasing the DVD of me jumping and I will have photos...

Stay tuned for some fun!

Great Advice from a Friend.... advice for us all!!

An email I received today at 9am.

When I read this.. I realized we need to apply this ALL to our life.. regardless of medical situations!

Please read:


Dear Josh -

I just read the blog entry you made last night about the test results and the CT scan scheduled for the end of the month. I know that this must seem like the world's longest-lasting nightmare at this point and I also know that more waiting can't help but take a real toll on you.

That said, I also know that you realize how very important it is for you to put the next test out of your mind until it actually happens. When you wake each morning, try to take a deep breath and just enjoy the fact that you feel good and that you have a rewarding and interesting job to do and lots and lots of friends and family who care about you. Whenever someone asks you to go to a movie or out for lunch or dinner, say yes and live in and enjoy that moment, that person, that experience. Treat yourself to a professional massage or something like that. Take a picnic to the beach ( it isn't that far away, is it?) Do something you've always wanted to do but have never gotten around to. Don't think ahead and don't try to guess what's around the next corner.

Our lives are made up of moments - that's all we get. No single moment ever comes again so we need to grab each one and live it to the fullest - just as you grabbed the chance to pass the peanuts on the plane last week! Don't allow anticipation of another test or doctor visit to steal the good moments away from you! I know from my own experience that this is far easier to preach than to actually do but I also know that if anyone can do this, you can! You already have - so just keep up the good work!

Love, M

Colonoscopy Results

When I got to the UC Davis Main Hospital GI department I filled out a ton of paperwork.
Since I did this procedure one year ago, I was oddly calm.

Once I left the waiting room, I was taken into the same room I was taken to a year ago. A nurse came in and filled out more paperwork, took my vitals and had me change into just a hospital gown.

I was then lead to a bed where I met my nurse Hazel. She was great!! Hazel could not believe that I was getting a colonoscopy due to cancer.

She kept saying "Josh, you are too young to be here!"
Hazel and I kept each other laughing though. I told her of my dream that I had the night before while she was inserting the IV into my forearm.

My dream was that I went into the hospital to get my colonoscopy and the IV did not knock me out -- so I felt, saw and heard everything.

Hazel told me that I had nothing to worry about. I asked her to give me a full dose of the anesthesia, PLUS another half dose!!

Well... I don't know what Hazel gave me, but I was knocked out!
I remember getting wheeled down the hall to the room.
I remember seeing the camera and the chain they use!
I remember Hazel hooking me up to all of these machines
I remember Hazel asking me to roll to my side.

I remember telling Hazel that I was WAY to awake for her to start!!
And I remember her telling me to give her my arm
She took a needle and put into my vein and.......

......


.....well, I don't remember anything until 6am the next morning.

Here is the scary part.

I do not remember the procedure
I do not remember waking up
I do not remember leaving the hospital
I do not remember being driven home by Brenda
I do not remember getting into my building
I do not remember getting into bed
I do not remember having my Hall Manager Colby key into my apartment and check on me at 8pm
I do not remember calling my mother -- twice -- once at 7pm EST and again at 2am EST (oops sorry mom)
I do not remember when my other Hall Manager, Theresa and RA Krystle, key into my apartment to check on me at 11pm.

I literally can not remember 15 hours of my life... that is scary.

When I awoke at 6am, I called my mom in Connecticut (it was 9am there for her)
I then called my friend Brenda, who drove me to the hospital. She was asleep.

I then walked into my living room to find my colonoscopy results sitting on my coffee table with photos!

RESULTS:
Endoscopic Survey was conducted via the anus
Rectum: Hemorrhoids
Sigmoid Colon: NORMAL
Descending Colon: NORMAL
Splenic Flexure: NORMAL
Transverse Colon: NORMAL
Hepatic Flexure: NORMAL
Ascending Colon: NORMAL
Cecum: NORMAL
Ileum: NORMAL
Special Diagnostic Techniques: Biopsies were taken from the Ileum, Cecum, Ascending colon, Transverse Colon, Descending Colon and Rectum.

Final Diagnosis: All Clear except hemorrhoids.


So, my colonoscopy went well...

... everything came up clear.. which would be good for most people, but not for me. Odd I know. Most people would be EXTREMELY happy with the results of my colonoscopy. Not so much for me.

You see, my doctors wanted to find something, like Colitis or Crones, so that they can rule out the cancer... Colitis or Crones would explain the tumors/inflamed lymph nodes... but since it is not anything caused by my GI track, we go back to the drawing board!

So, just before Halloween I am gong to have a CT scan and I have a scheduled meeting with my oncologist on Nov 4th!

Another 3 weeks of waiting...... UGH!

One thing we know for sure... this past weekend, nobody could accuse me of being full of shit! :)

Colonoscopy Advice

For those that will be having a colonoscopy in the future, here is my advice:

1. Do not schedule your colonoscopy for the afternoon. My oncologist schedule my colonoscopy for 3pm today (Thursday) because it was the only open time. My first colonoscopy (one year ago) was schedule for 9am and it was great. Let me explain why. You MUST stop eating and drinking one day in advance. So I had my last meal Tuesday night. I have only eaten Popsicles and jello. However, at midnight the night before you colonoscopy, you must stop eating and drinking EVERYTHING. So it is now 1:30pm, Thursday, and I have not had anything to drink since last night. Currently I am so thirsty!! My mouth feels like I have eaten cotton. So SCHEDULE EARLY!
2. Do not watch TV while fasting. Why is that when you cannot eat, you starve and when you can eat, you're not really hungry... welcome to my world!! However, when you are fasting, DO NOT WATCH TV. Why you ask? Well because EVERY other commercial is an advertisement for food -- like a delicious Whopper from Burger King or a $5 Foot Long Sub from Subway. IT IS NOT FAIR. I almost eat my pillow on my couch last night I was so hungry watching TV.. so instead of continuously torching myself throughout the night, I read a book.... with no food references!
3. Do not eat Green Jell-O. So you are only allow to drink clear liquids and food that you can see through (ie: Jell-O) However, you are not allowed to eat any food with Red Dye in it (ie: Red Jell-O) because it will mess up the colonoscopy. So I decided that I would make a large bowl of Green Jell-O! That was all fine and dandy until I had to starting using the bathroom and the toilet looked completely green. I freaked out! I almost called 911. I had no clue why everything coming out of my body was BRIGHT GREEN! I freaked out!! Then when I walked into the kitchen to get my cell phone to call my mom or 911, I saw my bowl of green Jell-O. So if you do eat Green Jell-O or yellow, blue, purple, etc... be prepared to see it again!! Remember that what goes in, must come out! And if it is the only thing you are allowed to eat.. it will come out looking the same color!! Gross -- yes, but it is the reality!
   
4. Liquid Hell. The prep liquid that the doctors give you to drink is horrible. I have no advice for you. I am sorry that you have to do it, but it is horrible. And for those that say it is easier the second time around because you know what is coming, they are liers! LOL. I thought it was worse! Knowing what is coming is horrible. I really have learned the meaning to the phrase "Ignorance is Bliss!!" No matter what you do to make the liquid go down, it sucks! Plainly stated!
   

OK, I am off to the hospital. My appointment is at 3pm, but I have to be there by 2:30pm

My friend Brenda is going to take me.. this is her second time taking me to get a colonoscopy...
You are not allowed to drive home because you are so drugged up. Find a good friend to take you!!

Thanks B!!

Details of my colonoscopy will soon be posted. (not too many details, I promise! :) )

Colonoscopy Prep

ugh... i forgot how much this sucks!
Im in the middle of drinking the prep liquids....
i have to drink a glass every 15 minutes...

so much harder than it sounds

the liquid tastes horrible!



I know that this test will show some results.
However, I scared to get these results...
if they are good -- great (which means they find something)
if they are bad -- ugh!

OK.. enough complaining...
time to drink....

The day I became a Southwest Flight Attendant -- "Peanuts anyone?"

So over the weekend (October 5-6th) I went to Santa Babara CA because I am part of the planning committee for WACUHO -- the Western Association for College and University Housing Officers -- hence why we call it WACUHO.. much easier to say! :)

I flew to and from Santa Barbara with the UC Davis crew. We had a wonderful time. We flew in and out of the Bob Hope Airport in Burbank CA.

The interesting thing about the Bob Hope Airport is when you exit/enter the plane, you walk off/on of the plane-- there is no terminal, just stairs off of the plane.

On our return flight home, I was boarding the plane with my collages. Upon climbing the stairs, I tripped and fell up the stairs.

The flight attendant came out and asked if I was ok.
With my pride a bit hurt, I told her I was fine. I also told her that I have always wanted to be a flight attendant (which is the truth... if I was not working in the University, I would totally be a flight attendant -- how fun would that be?!)

So I looked at her name tag and asked Chasity if I could help her pass out the peanuts because I feel up the stairs.. I knew it was a long shot, but I thought I would try.

SHE AGREED!! :)

So, after we took off, she put me in an apron and I became a Southwest Flight Attendant.
I passed out peanuts and pretzels.


(this is Chasity and I - she came to my rescue when I fell)


(PEANUTS?? PRETZELS??)


Here is the rest of the crew:



(Christy, Me, Chasity, and Casey -- they are Las Vegas flight crew)



(Crazy pose)

we has so much fun..
it was a nice break from life -- flying at 13,000 ft in the air!!


Thanks Southwest! :)

Colonoscopy Schedule

Today I received a phone call from UC Davis GI Department.

My Colonoscopy has been schedule! This is my second colonoscopy in a year.
They are checking for tumors in my colon/intestines.

My colonoscopy is schedule for this Thursday October 7 at 3:30pm.
I have be at the hospital at 2:30pm.

How Do I Prepare for a Colonoscopy?

There may be some diet or fluid restrictions before you have a colonoscopy but this will vary according to your doctor's instructions. You may be asked to limit or eliminate solid foods for a few days before the test. You may also be asked to take laxatives by mouth. Along with the dietary changes, your bowel must be further cleansed in order for colonoscopy to be successful. You will receive 2 enemas before the procedure because the rectum and lower intestine must be empty so that the intestinal walls can be seen. You will need to try to hold the enema solution for at least 5 minutes before releasing it.

Make sure you arrange for a driver to bring you home after the colonoscopy. Because you receive sedating medication during the procedure, it is unsafe for you to drive or operate machinery for 8 hours after the procedure.

What Happens During a Colonoscopy?

The colonoscopy is performed by a doctor experienced in the procedure and lasts approximately 30-60 minutes. Medications will be given into your vein to make you feel relaxed and drowsy. You will be asked to lie on your left side on the examining table. During a colonoscopy, the doctor uses a colonoscope, a long, flexible, tubular instrument about 1/2 inch in diameter that transmits an image of the lining of the colon so the doctor can examine it for any abnormalities. The colonoscope is inserted through the rectum and advanced to the other end of the large intestine.

The scope bends, so the doctor can move it around the curves of your colon. You may be asked to change position occasionally to help the doctor move the scope. The scope also blows air into your colon, which expands the colon and helps the doctor see better.

You may feel mild cramping during the procedure. You can reduce the cramping by taking several slow, deep breaths during the procedure. When the doctor has finished, the colonoscope is slowly withdrawn while the lining of your bowel is carefully examined.

During the colonoscopy, if the doctor sees something that may be abnormal, small amounts of tissue can be removed for analysis (called a biopsy), and abnormal growths, or polyps, can be identified and removed. In many cases, colonoscopy allows accurate diagnosis and treatment without the need for a major operation.

What Happens After a Colonoscopy?

After your colonoscopy:

• You will stay in a recovery room for about 30 minutes for observation
• You may feel some cramping or a sensation of having gas, but this usually passes quickly
• You can resume your normal diet

Read your discharge instructions carefully. Certain medications, such as blood-thinning agents, may need to be avoided temporarily if biopsies were taken or polyps were removed.

Bleeding and puncture of the colon are rare but possible complications of colonoscopy. Call your doctor right away if you have any of the following:

• Excessive or prolonged rectal bleeding
• Severe abdominal pain, fever, or chills

Here is the crazy part of all of this..... I am not allowed to eat from Tuesday at midnight until after my colonoscopy. I am going to starve!! HA!

I have be to honest and say that I am not looking forward to getting a colonoscopy, but I am looking forward to getting the results of this test.

The results of the test will hopefully tell me a lot about what is going on.

So until Thursday, I wait....

.... sometimes I wish I was a bit more patient!

Kevins Response to my Blog

bullshit! I still want phonecalls.

love you too,

kevin.

HA! I love it!